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Marriage

Don’t be jealous if I spend 50% of my time with you and 50% of my time with others, because you get 100% of 50%, while all the others have to share that other 50%. This is the speech I’ve prepared to tell my wife in the future, when I’m spending a majority minus one percent of my time with my clones.

- Jarod Kintz
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
- Rodney Dangerfield
Marriage should be between a spouse and a spouse, not a gender and a gender.
- Hendrik Hertzberg
When a girl marries, she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.
- Helen Rowland
In marriage, everyday you love and everyday you forgive. It is an ongoing sacrament, love and forgiveness.
- Bill Moyers
Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
- Anonymous
Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate but through being the right mate.
- Barnett R. Brickner
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