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Marriage
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
- Sacha Guitry
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
- Rodney Dangerfield

Don’t be jealous if I spend 50% of my time with you and 50% of my time with others, because you get 100% of 50%, while all the others have to share that other 50%. This is the speech I’ve prepared to tell my wife in the future, when I’m spending a majority minus one percent of my time with my clones.

- Jarod Kintz
The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding.
- Oscar Wilde
Marriage should be between a spouse and a spouse, not a gender and a gender.
- Hendrik Hertzberg
The essential matrimonial facts: that to be happy you have to find variety in repetition; that to go forward you have to come back to where you begin.
- Jeffrey Eugenides
What we do for each other before marriage is no indication of what we will do after marriage.
- Gary D. Chapman
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