Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
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