Quotations
Funny
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
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