Quotations
Funny
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
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