Quotations
Funny
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
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