Quotations
Funny
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
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