Quotations
Funny
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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