Quotations
Marriage
Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
- Henny Youngman
Don’t be jealous if I spend 50% of my time with you and 50% of my time with others, because you get 100% of 50%, while all the others have to share that other 50%. This is the speech I’ve prepared to tell my wife in the future, when I’m spending a majority minus one percent of my time with my clones.
- Jarod Kintz
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
- Groucho Marx
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Marriage is more about work than about divine luck, more about finding someone to love than about finding someone to meet your own laundry list of personal needs.
- Mark Gorman
Oh, of course there's a risk in marrying anybody, but when it's all said and done, there's many a worse thing than a husband.
- L. M. Montgomery
I wouldn't want to marry anybody who was wicked, but I think I'd like it if he COULD be wicked and WOULDN'T.
- L. M. Montgomery
He knows little who will tell his wife all he knows.
- Thomas Fuller
Never forget the nine most important words of any family:
I love you.
You are beautiful.
Please forgive me.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
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