Quotations
Funny
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
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