Quotations
Funny
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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