Quotations
Funny
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
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