Quotations
Funny
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
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