Quotations
Funny
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
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