Quotations
Funny

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein

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