Quotations
Funny

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein

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