Quotations
Funny
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
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