Quotations
Funny
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
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