Quotations
Funny

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde

Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw

The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain

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