Quotations
Funny
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
- George Bernard Shaw
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
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