Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
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