Quotations
Funny
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
- Winston S. Churchill
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
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