Quotations
Funny
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
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