Quotations
Funny
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
- Nikola Tesla
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
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