Quotations
Funny
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
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