Quotations
Funny
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
- George Bernard Shaw
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
- George Eliot
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
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