Quotations
Funny
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
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