Quotations
Funny
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
- George Bernard Shaw
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
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