Quotations
Funny
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
- Winston S. Churchill
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
- Voltaire
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston S. Churchill
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
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