Quotations
Funny
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
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