Quotations
Funny
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
- Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
- Frank Sinatra
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
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