Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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