Quotations
Funny
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
- Wilson Mizner
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
- George Carlin
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
- Anonymous
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
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