Quotations
Funny
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
- Ronald Reagan
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
- Yogi Berra
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
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