Quotations
Funny
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
- George Bernard Shaw
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
- Benjamin Franklin
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Oscar Wilde
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