Quotations
Funny
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
- Oscar Wilde
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
- Benjamin Franklin
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
- Alexandre Dumas
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