Quotations
Funny
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
- George Bernard Shaw
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
- George Carlin
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
- Woody Allen
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
- Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
- Albert Einstein
I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
- Alfred North Whitehead
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