Quotations
Funny
A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
- Anonymous
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
- Mark Twain
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
- Winston S. Churchill
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
- Mark Twain
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
- Mark Twain
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
- Oscar Wilde
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