Quotations
Funny
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
- Jarod Kintz
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
- Ambrose Bierce
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
- Ambrose Bierce
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
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