Quotations
Mark Twain

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

Be good and you will be lonesome.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

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