Quotations
Funny

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

-Benjamin Franklin

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

-Mark Twain

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

-Oscar Wilde

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

-Mark Twain

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

-Benjamin Franklin

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

-George Carlin

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.

-Alexandre Dumas

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

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