Quotations
Funny

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

-Oscar Wilde

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

-Anonymous

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

-Mark Twain

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

-Oscar Wilde

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

-George Bernard Shaw

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

-Mark Twain

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

-Winston S. Churchill

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

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