A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.
-Anonymous
Quotations
Funny
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-George Carlin
