When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
-Albert Einstein
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.
-Benjamin Franklin
The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me
-Jarod Kintz
"The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
