Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
-Oscar Wilde
Quotations
Funny
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.
-Alexandre Dumas
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
-George Eliot
"Adam Bede"
