When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read.
-Winston S. Churchill
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
-Winston S. Churchill
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
-Mark Twain
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
-Oscar Wilde
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
