Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?
-George Bernard Shaw
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
There is one other reason for dressing well, namely that dogs respect it, and will not attack you in good clothes.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
