Quotations
Funny

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

-Mark Twain

When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

-Mark Twain

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.

-Winston S. Churchill

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.

-Yogi Berra

TV is chewing gum for the eyes.

-Frank Lloyd Wright

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

-Mark Twain

My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my family, its seems, begins where yours left off.

-Alexandre Dumas

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce

I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.

-Alfred North Whitehead

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

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