Quotations
Funny

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

-Oscar Wilde

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

-Albert Einstein

I'm not denyin' the women are foolish: God Almighty made 'em to match the men.

-George Eliot "Adam Bede"

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

-George Bernard Shaw

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

-Oscar Wilde

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

-Ronald Reagan

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

-Ambrose Bierce "Epigrams of a Cynic"

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

-Mark Twain

The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.

-Voltaire

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

-Frank Sinatra

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