I always feel that I have two duties to perform with a parting guest: one, to see that he doesn't forget anything that is his; the other, to see that he doesn't take anything that is mine.
-Alfred North Whitehead
Quotations
Funny
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
-Mark Twain
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
Copy from one, its plagiarism; copy from two, its research.
-Wilson Mizner
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
