I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
Quotations
Funny
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
-Benjamin Franklin
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
-Frank Sinatra
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
