Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
Quotations
Funny
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
-Mark Twain
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
Ladies, gentlemen and those who are yet to make up your mind.
-Anonymous
"The movie “Kinky Boots"
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-Oscar Wilde
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
