As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
Quotations
Funny
The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
-Mark Twain
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.
-Yogi Berra
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
-George Carlin
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.
-Mark Twain
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
The husband who decides to surprise his wife is often very much surprised himself.
-Voltaire
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.
-Nikola Tesla
