Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.
-Benjamin Franklin
Quotations
Funny
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
-Ambrose Bierce
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?
-Albert Einstein
As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
-Oscar Wilde
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
-Frank Lloyd Wright
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-Mark Twain
The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.
-Ronald Reagan
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
-Mark Twain
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.
-George Bernard Shaw
I am not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
-Woody Allen
