Quotations
Mark Twain

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

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