Quotations
Mark Twain

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.

God

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

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