The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
The lack of money is the root of all evil.
God: The most popular scapegoat for our sins.
It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
